Chapter 5: Drunken Rants

When Arnav walked into the house an hour before midnight, he found Khushi pacing back and forth in the living room looking extremely worried.  The phone was glued to her ear and she was muttering something to herself.  Arnav closed the door behind him and walked towards her, his anger mounting.  She turned to him when she heard him approached and she flared instantly.  She threw the phone away carelessly and stomped up to him until they met each other halfway through the living room.

"Where the hell were you?" She demanded with a raised voice, looking worried.  "Do you know how worried we've been?  Everyone else is out looking for you!  Why didn't you take any of our calls?"

"You didn't answer mine either."  He said flatly.

Confusion skittered across her face.   "When did you call?"

"When you were on your date."  Arnav bit out.

Her face went blank.  Expressionless.  He hated when she did that.  "I wasn't on a date.  Anjali and Payal told me what happened here.  I know that you know that they tricked me into it."

He grabbed her by her shoulders and shook her.

 "Why didn't you just come home?  Why the hell did you have to stay there?" Arnav's fingers dug into her arms and she glared at him.

"Let go Arnav.  You're hurting me!"  Khushi tried to wrench herself out of his grip.  When Arnav didn't move, Khushi put her hands on his chest and pushed him away.  "LET ME GO!  What the hell is wrong with you?  Why are you so angry?"

His eyes flashed for a quick second and Khushi's eyes shot daggers at him.  This random burst of anger from him made no sense at all.  What the hell was this about her not being allowed on a date while he brought girls every other freaking month!

"Why didn't you answer my calls?"  He questioned her as if she hadn't spoken, grabbing her arms again.

She glared at his hands on her arms, put her hands against his chest and pushed once again.  For some reason, the fact that he even thought she would be on a date without telling him infuriated her.  She didn't want to have this conversation with him at this moment.  Not when he was irrationally angry and she felt her own anger bubbling up.  But the hint of anguish in his eyes kept her rooted to her spot.  For now.

"My phone was dead!  And I didn't leave because he's a friend."  She said as calmly as she could manage.

"He likes you."  Arnav stated clearly, once again as if she hadn't spoken.

"Yes, I know.  He told me."  Khushi looked at him steadily.

Arnav's eyes widened at her calm demeanour.  Some man was out there and had feelings for her...but she stayed there with him...on a date...and entertained the idea??  He couldn't take that.  Hell, he wouldn't take that.

"And you still stayed there?  Do you like him, too?"  Arnav clenched his fists, secretly afraid of her answer.  Please say no.  Please say no.

"Yes I like him..."  Khushi spoke calmly, making his heart stutter a beat.  "But not in the romantic sense.  He's a good guy, Arnav.  He took it well when I told him that I don't feel the same way for him."  Khushi tried to calm him down by placing her hand on his chest tentatively.  She could see the storm brewing in his eyes.

"Are you still friends with him?"  His voice was icy. 

"Yes."

"And you think its right??"  He yelled.

Khushi's pent up anger exploded.  Enough was enough.  She never told him to dump a girl she didn't like.  She hated all them but she never asked him to stop seeing them.  Sure, he was her best friend but even he didn't have the right to tell her what to do.  Khushi was an independent woman and she wasn't going to stand here and take crap from someone who clearly was out of his senses thanks to his colossal temper.

"Why can't we still be friends?  Just because he likes me, I have to stop speaking to the guy??  If he doesn't have an issue, if I don't have an issue I don't see why you should!"  Khushi yelled back.

He grabbed her arms and crashed into his muscled chest.  "Because you're leading him on!  He won't give up hope!  He will try every chance he gets to try and get you to feel the same way for him!  You've made the wrong decision!"  

Khushi pushed at him again and struggled to free herself.  "Get the fuck off of me, Arnav!"

Not paying any heed to her, he held both hands in one of his and wrapped one of his arms around her waist.

"You're not going to be friends with him."  He spoke with finality.

No one...and that meant no one barks an order at Khushi.  Her eyes darkened with pure anger and she stopped moving.  She looked at him steadily and he knew in that instant that she would say something he wasn't going to like.

"Would you have said the same thing if this situation happened with us?  Say I fell in love with you and you didn't feel the same way...you'd stop being friends?  Say you fell in love with me and I didn't feel the same way, then I should stop being friends with you?"  She countered him.

"YES!"  He yelled back without thinking.  She stood unfazed in front of him.  It was as if she had expected this answer.

He processed his own words for a silent minute and then he pulled her into a bone crushing hug.  She stood idle in his hold and didn't hug him back.  He noticed.  Khushi's mind was reeling around the one word answer he'd given her.

I was right.  I was so right.  Khushi thought to herself.

"I'm sorry, baby...I...I didn't mean that."  Arnav closed his eyes, cursing himself for his stupidity.

But he was too late.  The damage was done.  Words are like arrows...once they are shot out of the bow...you can't just take them back.

"Go to sleep, Arnav.  We'll talk tomorrow when you and I have calmed down."  She said before pulling out of the hug, turning on her heels and walking into her room.

*

Arnav drank the bitter liquid in one go and slammed the empty glass on the counter at the bar.  His eyes stung as his throat burned because of the alcohol.

"Three more shots."  He ordered the bartender in a slurred speech.

He took the three shots as soon as they were placed in front of him.  "Three more."

Why is the entire world trying to steal her from me?  Why can't they see what she means to me?  Why can't she see what she means to me?  Sure, I haven't put it in words for her but she can tell by the way I treat her, can't she?  No one sees it.  They wouldn't have tricked her into going to that date otherwise!

Arnav gulped down another vodka shot.

I love her, dammit! 

Another shot.  More alcohol.  More anger.  More hurt.

Why is everyone blind to the fact?  Why can't anyone see how much effort I've been putting in to get her to feel the same way?  Why can't Di understand that I've been bringing home all those girls to make Khushi feel even a tad bit jealous?  Why doesn't Khushi feel jealous?  She's not bothered in the slightest about it.  Why can't she just react the way I want her to?  I got jealous today when I heard about her stupid date with that stupid guy...why doesn't she get jealous?  Just show the slightest hint of jealousy Khushi...just once.  That's all I need.  At least when you get jealous, I'll know you have some feelings for me.  But you never get jealous.  Ever.

Arnav downed the last shot angrily.

She doesn't feel jealous because she doesn't love me.  I'm her best friend...and that's it.  But I won't give up...I'll continue bringing girls home until she gets jealous. I'll continue being her best friend until she's ready for me to be more than that.  I can't give up...I love her.  I'll continue masking my feelings.  She can't find out now...she'll leave if she finds out.  When I'm sure she feels the same way about me, I'll tell her I love her.  I'll tell her that she's everything to me.  I'll tell her she's only mine.

Arnav sat staring at the numerous shot glasses in front of him, his thoughts revolving around Khushi.  The more he thought, the more dejected he felt.  His phone was vibrating in his pocket but even that went unnoticed by him.

"Why don't you just tell her if you love her?"  Some girl spoke to him.

He turned to see her and realized that he didn't know her.  He frowned when the girl swayed in front of him.

"How do you know I love her? Even she doesn't know."  Arnav pouted.

The girl giggled.  "That's all you've been muttering for the past half an hour!"

"Stop moving..." he pointed at her when he saw her swaying again, making her chuckle and shake her head.  He was so drunk that he didn't realize that he was the one swaying and not her.

"Why don't you just tell her?"  The girl repeated her question.

"Because she doesn't love me."

"So what?"

"So...I don't want to lose my best friend..."

"Ahh...is this one of those situations where you fell in love with your best friend but she doesn't love you back and you don't want to tell her because you feel like once she finds out she'll stop being friends with you?"  The girl asked.

Arnav squinted at the girl.  "Are you a mind reader?"

The girl giggled.  This man was so drunk! 

"No...I'm not a mind reader but I went through this...if you ask me...I say tell her.  If she's going to stop being friends with you because of it, she's just a plain bitch."

"NO!"  Arnav's anger spilled out at last.  "Don't you...you can't...don't you dare talk about her like that!  Maybe you're a bitch and that's why you think everyone else is a bitch!"

The girl was taken aback at the man's outburst.  She had only come over because she found him hot.  He was upset, lonely, and drunk...an easy target for a one night stand.  Now that she'd seen him lash out at her, all she did was roll her eyes at him and walk away to the other corner of the bar.

The anger seemed to have brought him out of his thoughts and he felt the phone vibrate in his pocket.  He fished it out with difficulty and answered it with even more difficulty.  The buttons didn't want to cooperate.

"Khushi!"  He drawled drunkenly into the phone.

"Where the fuck are you?"  She bit out.  She was angry.

"How's your boyfriend, Khushi?"  Arnav chuckled.

He heard her sigh on the other end of the line.  "Arnav...where are you?"  Her tone was significantly calmer than before now that she'd heard what state he was in.

"I...some bar..."

"Which bar?"  Her voice sounded urgent.

"I...forgot."  Arnav frowned.  He looked around the bar and then saw the bartender taking away his shot glasses.  "What bar is this?"

"Richard's Cove."  The bartender answered with raised eyebrows.

"Cove's Richard."  Arnav spoke into the phone.

"Arnav...listen to me carefully...stay where you are.  I'm coming to get you, okay?"  She talked to him in a tone one would use with a child.

"Okay Khush!  I won't move."

*

Half an hour later, when a frantic Khushi walked into the bar with Akash on her tail, they found Arnav sitting at the bar counter, twirling a small glass, his head leaned on the counter.  Khushi immediately rushed to him.

"Arnav?"  She shook his shoulder gently.

"Khush!  Hi!"  Arnav's mood brightened right away.

"Let's go, Arnav...get up."  Khushi spoke sternly as she wrapped her arm around his torso and started helping him up.

As Arnav threw his arm around her, she staggered under the weight and looked over her shoulder to see Akash paying the bartender.  Together, Akash and Khushi helped Arnav out to her car.  Khushi fished his pockets for the keys to his car.  She tossed the keys to Akash.  Akash helped Khushi get Arnav seated in the car.  He gave a weary look to his cousin and then looked at Khushi.

"Don't worry...I'll follow your car...I'll pull over if anything."  Khushi assured him as she got behind the wheel.

As planned, Khushi drove right behind Arnav's car as Akash drove it home.  They helped Arnav all the way to the penthouse and the three were immediately surrounded by three more people.  Anjali, Rohan and Payal.  Once they had Arnav seated on his bed, Khushi told Akash and Payal to call it a day.  The two had been worried sick ever since Arnav's argument with them.  Anjali managed to convince Rohan to leave as well.  The two ladies Arnav loved the most fussed over him and tried to make him sleep.  He kept his random muttering on.  Anjali and Khushi could make out bits of it and mainly it had to do with Khushi.  Anjali looked at Khushi guiltily.

"It's all my fault..." she said, sounding broken.

Khushi shook her head.  "You know how protective he gets...don't worry about it.  He'll be back to normal tomorrow..."

"I'll make him some pasta to eat...he's had too much to drink, he should eat something."  Anjali muttered more to herself than Khushi and left.

Anjali had just closed the door shut behind her when Khushi heard Arnav hiccup.  Thinking he might throw up, she led him to the washroom.  She sprinkled some water on his face and that seemed to help him focus a little bit more.  Taking the liberty, Khushi splashed his face with cold water and led him back to the bed, a face towel in her free hand.  She wiped his face while he stared at her.

"Khushi..."  He whispered lightly.

She shot him a tearful glare.  "Why do you do this to me, Arnav?  You're going to give me a heart attack one of these days."

One tear escaped onto her cheek and Arnav frowned.  He picked up the rolling tear onto the tip of his finger and glared it.

"I hate you...You're a stupid tear.  Stay away from my Khushi."  He glared at the tear drop and looked back at Khushi who looked at him amusedly.

He leaned dangerously close to her and Khushi felt her breath get lodged in her throat.  He pressed his lips to her cheek just where the tear was a few seconds ago.  He pulled back a little bit until the tips of their noses were touching.  Khushi kept her eyes closed as she felt his alcohol tinged breath brush against her lips.

"You won't leave me like Ma did, right?"  He spoke in a heartbreaking voice.

Khushi's eyes flew open.  She saw the fear, the worry in his. 

"No...I won't..." she said breathlessly.

He smiled a little and then his eyes lowered and focused on her lips.  Khushi swallowed a lump in her throat.  Her eyes shut again when she felt him move closer ever so slowly.  Her heart roared ahead like a jackhammer.  Any second, his lips would touch hers.  Any second, he would kiss her for the first time ever and any second, their relationship would change.

"Good...I never want to let you go..."  Arnav whispered.

Khushi braced herself for the feel of his lips against hers but the feel never came.  Arnav pressed his lips on her cheek at the corner of her mouth.  An electric tingle ran up and down Khushi's spine regardless.  Her hands reached up to hold on to his shoulders.  Even though he was the drunk one, she felt like she would fall off the bed any moment.  Even with her eyes closed, she could feel herself swaying lightly.  His hot breath lingered along her jaw, down the side of her neck and then she felt his warm lips press against her shoulder.

He tucked his head into the curve of her neck and shoulder.  The moment passed as soon as it had come while he drifted off to sleep.  His arms snaked around her waist and he breathed out a contented sigh, feeling complete with her in his arms.

*

Arnav opened his eyes against the light and felt his vision blur momentarily.  He registered a headache and something soft and warm snuggled up to him.  He smiled as he figured out who it must be.

"How's your head?"  Her voice sounded somewhat angry.

"You're awake?"  He blurted.

Khushi lifted her head up to look at him.  "I've been awake for the past hour..."

"Why didn't you go, then?"  He looked at her confusedly.

Khushi wiggled in his arms and he realized that he was holding onto her in a vice like grip.  She couldn't have left even if she wanted to.

"Sorry..." he said sheepishly, letting her go.

Khushi sat up and stretched to loosen her stiff muscles.  He sat up and then he finally noticed the skull-splitting headache.  With a sigh, Khushi stood up and left.  Arnav cursed under his breath as he recalled last night.  His last coherent memory was seeing Khushi in the bar.  A couple minutes later, Khushi returned with a glass of water and a painkiller in her hand.  With a glare on her beautiful face, she handed him the items without a word. 

He obediently took the medication and handed the glass back to her.  She was about to leave but he grabbed her hand and stopped her.  He gently pulled her down on the bed in front of him.  He pulled the glass out of her hand and placed it on the side table before taking both her hands in his.

"I'm sorry."  He whispered apologetically.

"For what?"  She said in a clipped voice.  "For yelling at your sister and your friends?  For yelling at me because I was out for dinner with a friend?  For yelling at me for being friends with a guy who happens to like me?  For trying to control me?  For barking orders at me as if I'm some slave who is to do your bidding?  For disappearing last night and giving us a heart attack?  For getting hammered?  What exactly are you sorry for?"

"I'm sorry for hurting you."  He looked up at her sheepishly, yet truly apologetic.  "I know you're right about everything you just said and I know all of that has hurt you.  And I'm sorry for that.  I just...you know how protective I feel towards you and...I just got worried when I found out that you were on a date and you didn't even know.  I was worried that the guy might misbehave with you and I couldn't stand the fact that I couldn't reach you...I took out all the temper on you and I shouldn't have.  I never meant to hurt you.  I'm so sorry."

Khushi sighed defeatedly.  She couldn't stay angry with him more than a few minutes.  He always managed to make the anger dissipate with his words and his stupid boyish expressions.  Damn him!

She leaned in and gave him a hug.  "I swear if you disappear like that again, I will kill you."

There was no mention of the last bit of their conversation from last night.  Khushi had very carefully left that detail out.  Clearly, he didn't seem to remember that they'd almost kissed last night and she wasn't going to remind him.  Not when she feared that him knowing about it may cause issues in their friendship.

*

As they sat down at the dining table for lunch, Arnav had apologized for his behaviour to everyone.  Akash and Rohan had shrugged it off almost immediately, saying that it wasn't a big deal but Anjali didn't think so.  She was upset with him.

The week continued regularly, with no changes in any plans.  Anjali's behaviour towards Arnav had gradually returned to normal.  As the ladies' last dance class approached, Arnav had been feeling restless but he didn't let it show.  He didn't want to end up shouting at his Di, Payal, and Khushi again.  More than that, he didn't want to accidentally admit what he felt for her and risk losing her over it.  As usual, he would continue labelling his feelings as friendship' in front of the world and he would continue his mission in trying to make Khushi jealous.

Little did he know that his mission had succeeded years ago.